Not for the faint hearted

my dearest, and i mean all of you.
i dont want to write another entry of heavy loneliness...

i think i am beginning to understand why some people are always be in a relationship. There is something unexplainable about burrowing your face in his shoulders, about placing your palms flat on his chest, about feeling his heartbeat, about walking your fingers on his skin, about watching his eyes, his smile, and playing his expressions in slow motion when he is not with you. there is that the resonating sound of a gong when you run into his arms, the sweet and oh-so-delicious bounce when your bodies meet, the very tangible and satisfying grasp of your hands on his arms, the soft silky whisper his hair makes when your fingers weave in. the addiction which makes your lips reluctant to leave his.

these make my hands itch, my heart long, my soul hungry... because i have tasted it. i know how it felt. that incredible, intense and drug-ery experience of love.

....so instead, i have written about the heavy pull of desire...

Side note:
if you have not, please go to T. of Magpies (under Her Interest, on your right, and read the entry on Sunday 29th of March.). It is absolutely clever and hilarious... haha... (i so want that book!)

missing something

have you ever felt that you are missing something?
you arent quite sure what exactly, except that you are not complete.
it is more than having a religion; it is more than having a twin. more, even than having a lover, i think.

i dont know why, but i do feel like that quite frequently. turning to friends, to music, to books, to.. to the sky for company, for answers- to fill my void. i need something but i dont know what. there is a something out there, someone maybe, some thingy that will fit me, just right... something to make me glow, and not just for a while. something that will make my life a lot more worthwhile, a lot more rich, a lot MORE.

i dont know if waiting is the right strategy, however, i seriously doubt it. but how do i go about taking action? being pro-active? can i drop my work, my family and just GO? because there is something, someone maybe, just around the corner, just around the bend.

have you ever felt like you are missing something?

it was erm... an...adventure

Collected the car at Novena Square.
(Got an Adidas sport shoe along the way)
Circled Newton Circle
Circled Newton Circle (just realised to exit from Scott Rd)
Drove along Orchard Rd
Drove along Orchard Rd (Took wrong turn before Grange Rd)
Reach Dempsey Road
Had tea at House
(Found out that they do not have wireless! (when they promised that they have))
Drove along Commonwealth Ave West
Drove along Commonwealth Ave West (exit too early so i had to go back)
Missed IMM carpark
Got into IMM carpark (All levels full except level 6)
(tested promoter on duty - pass :) )
(promoter sold 3 units)
Drove along PIE - BKE - SLE - Woodlands
(Surf online at Starbucks - checking flights to Aussie)
Reach home
(parked damn far away because carpark full... sheesh)

All these could not have been possible without my dear brave friend - Jes.
who have learnt how to read a streetdirectory from me.. hahaha...
and for feeding me food while i drive around haha...
it was really fun!!!! lets do it again next time... (crazily smiling)

Grace is feeling...

im painting my nails black
im going for a drive-ride

i have cried
i have been biten
i have gotten even

if you want a piece of me, take a Q ticket.

Today in my life

What I see

Is the bible on his desk and he already left
Is the angry sky and the lack of stars
Is the circle of old men sitting at the park
Is the father and son B-ball team
Is 'fuck' on the lift door
Is the empty house.

What you see?
...
The words or the breast