TGIF clear skies in SG

Today the sky is a large velvet of midnight blue, and the stars stood out like pin pricks holes. As I walked home, even against the light of the lamp post at the parking lot, I could make out the limited scatter of stars that grace our little island along the midway of the earth. And it is indeed, gracious that I get to enjoy them, scarce as they are to come by- clear skies at night in Singapore.

And to everyone overseas or not, and esp. Ann, I hope your days and nights are just as clear and smooth sailing. Stay healthy! Love.

- Posted on my trusty ifone :)

The extremes

Sometimes I wish I am a more typical person, not inclined to spouting illogicalness and fanciful thinkings. Or maybe, I wish I was the other extreme- just bloody mad and loony.

But, I'm just half baked, not at any end of the spectrum.. Which leaves me open to attacks to both extremes.

Just normal plainess or crazy nutcase for me please. Just one, and the gd fortune to stick with it till my life ends.


- Posted on my trusty ifone :)

PM - give all your worries and care to God

- Posted on my trusty ifone :)

Just human nature

Isn't it just human nature to create chaos and destruction in our wake? Kill mother earth, harm fellow earthings ( animals and plants alike) and hurt our own species?

Everyone knows I'm not big into green. I mean if it doesn't incovenience me v much, I will consider la! But I am not a dieheart supporter la...

But this destruction that we create, that we help assist along seems to trencend just environment.., it seems that we harm others too, intentionally n unintentionally. And we can't seem to control that can we?!?! Is that why we have the Golden Rule?!?!! Because it is human nature to go against it? Do onto others what you want others to do onto you. And it seems that hurt n harm is all that is going around these days.

sick monday

i think the anti-bodies is should have been given to me earlier lah! i finished all the medicine that the doctor prescribed and all i recovered from was a sore- throat. the cough worsen, my nose got blocked... sheesh... today finally, the doctor gave me the anti-bodies... sheesh... need prove of my green mucus is it???

Anyway... today is not all that bad la... breakfast and lunch is plain fare but sweet... and the dinner is delectable! haha... i know i shouldnt have but i cant resist chocolate and cheese cake... but seriously the cheese cake didnt taste so good... maybe my taste bud is not so good le... sigh. anyway... i wan to recover ASAP!

BTW, Skye, if you see this! Pls sms me your new number!

sick, sick, sick!

i got up early for a sunday... i guess i had to because i was coughing... my phlegm is disgusting and green. and they are a lot. the doctor rests on sundays... and so my mom doctored me with green bean soup... other than a quick trip to office to tidy up my desk, i spent my entire day at home- in my room. my books have all been finished. the DVD has also run out... but my headache did not.

I find it weird that i suddenly developed a seriously painful headache in the mid day... it is like the the Monkey God's golden headband... tightening around my temples.. at the back of my head... it is driving me crazy.. I want to scream out my pain.. yet my cough keep me silent..

This isnt the first time i had developed headache from coughing and sore throat... i cant believe it lor.... where got people as weak as me one?!!!! sheesh... no point wasting my energy now la... hate myself for being so useless and weak!

Sick Saturday

Spent the saturday morning nursed in bed with books and stories because my sore throat developed into cough. Was supposed to do other stuff. Took the cough syrup after meal and was chart groggily to my grandma's. Dinner was a few pieces of broccoli and pieces of fish and fried snacks catered. Didn't feel hungry instead my chest hurts, my collar area is sore to touch despite my smoddering of my coughs. Yet I feel like my health is the least of my concern. I guess this shows just how careless I am with my body. Haiz, but there are more important things to worry about.


- Posted on my trusty ifone :)

my neighbour - the gardener

he gardens out of his doorway.
his other job, the one which
takes him away in the morning,
that is his only part time job.

whenever i return from work,
he is always humbly tending
to his ladies- Lily, Jasmine
and Vanda Miss Joaquim.

always, I would greet him,
but he never smiles back,
too lost in his gardening-
his full time job.

theres only that long you can defer

i dont need to paint you a picture of a crossroad, no need to draw out the split path, nor waste effort hammering a creaky road sign in the middle to make you get it- the feeling of being confounded. the feeling of having to let go of what you have and starting over, rebuilding, and not knowing what will happen... if you will ever get whatever you had back. or if you will find something unexpected and outrageously wonderful.

we all faced these roads in our lives... sometimes we were pushed to such situations.. sometimes we actually cause ourselves to be in that situation... nevertheless, we were there (or are here). and there are only a few things to do... Namely, 1. go back and pray that we hit this fork again when we are wiser. 2. go forward-venture into the unknown. 3. go forward with what we know. 4. wait. defer the decision.

Of the 4, Pt. 1 and Pt 4. appeals to our logically side... afterall, we need to think about it...we need to plan, to forecast etc. However, they cause time lapse.. and who knows? oil might be back to $40/barrel... COE might skyrocket (like it isnt already now). Countries may have sunk into the sea... etc. etc. etc.

Pt. 2 is SAFE. that itself is telling.

Pt. 3 is RISKY. and that is just as telling...

We simply dont know... do we? So, what is the right decision to make? how to make it? what is the best info that i have/ can get? and seriously... what is the impact of my decision? bec... who knows... i might hit another fork 3km down the road.. or 300km down the road... and wont that change your mind?

the most important things in life... what are they? and what are the things in life that just seems important?

Shopping Saturday!

Hiya!!!









- Posted on my trusty ifone :)

My big questions

Three quarter past one in the morning, if you can call it that, and I lay on my crowded bed thinking.

The few important questions in life, disregarding the common household variety of "Do you take this man/ woman as your lawful wedded husband/wife ...?", "is it a boy or a girl?" and "burial or cremation", seems to be all centered around the cosmic, or like how thickly coated in chocolate the Magnum is, the questions encapsulates our every waking moment. Making sense of our surrounding esp by finding answers in the unprovable is an instinctive feature of being man.

The qns I would like to ask would be the following:
1. To what extent, if any, does divine intervantion act on us.
2. What is the purpose of living for all and what is mine?
- I skipped the question on God's existence because the fact that I expect answers to my qns points to an Answerer who would be all wise, all knowing and all powerful.

- Posted on my trusty ifone :)

Breathe Grace, breathe

Sometimes I take a large lung full of air for no apparent reason. Or so you think. But it ain't so, not always.
You think a madman could not know that he is in an insitution? I think sometimes I am accutely aware of a cage I'm in, those times I struggle to breathe.


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Thoughtful on Sunday

The child responses instinctively to his name. Turning back with a toothless grin and crawling towards the lady who called. I wonder, how could he have known that name is his and react so naturally.


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All that anger

It was a really really nice dinner and a really really shity ktv. Hahah ok not true la. The ktv is ok except that as usual i sux at it. I could put aside the pain in my stomach till I finally reach home- I immediately put some oilment on it and rub forcefully. My brother had to ask me for my mom's petrol card pin number just as I go to bath. Hello??? I pass u after la! But he wouldn't listen and insisted on it. So I LL have to go back to my bedroom, find my phone n find the number I saved on my notes function. I was really pissed with his attitude. Moreover, before I could come out, I hear him asking for his clothes which he left in the bathroom. So I said, "ya sure watever, wait I am coming out." when I did, he scold "F**k". And I'm like.... What?
Gosh, i felt terribly unbalanced, I mean hello??! I got u the info u wanted, when you wanted, had to put my wants behind yours, don't get any appreciation and still have to listen to your "F**k"?!?!?!?
If I hate you every now and then- it's fine wat! Makes perfect sense eh!? Sheesh. Looking at how I get treated at home, is it any wonder why sometimes I am a spoilt brat outside? Always being stubbon?

Thank you, my friends for puttig up with me on bad days.

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Goodbye & Goodnight

And the last step was made,
as my body prepared for bed.

I finally reach home at 11. Tired and sad. It has been a tiring day, I feel like I lost 2 friends today. 1 to distance, the other to miscommunication. I honestly don't know which is more permenent.

My feet hurts even with them propped on the bed. I think I must have over walked or stand today. My eyes play tricks with me as I spell and re-spell my words.

I think I love my friends too much to ever consider them bf material, not that they are not qualified but seriously I love them too much la. Friendship is forever, but love is unpredictable.

I think I should take a break soon. Feel so tired not just physically and mentally, I think spiritually also. Need to sleep le.

I love u guys, maybe I dun tell u often enough but seriously, i do.



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Post wedding

I have been too indulgent with myself. Taking cabs so often these days. Now on a cab back home. Can't wait to take off my makeup and bath. I need to sleep! Plus tmr morning is an early day.

P.S. The wedding have finally been concluded.

- Posted on my trusty ifone :)

Thinking of you

It is a calming thing to realize that I am comfortably seated, and could just look out of the window and dream or think of useless things. The quiet makes my breathe stand out and amplified my thoughts. And they are all about people.
To the various Yous out there. I miss you. I worry about you flying away. I feel your loss. I look forward to your future. I want to know how you are doing now.
And I wonder if you are thinking of me now.

- Posted on my trusty ifone :)

Shuttle bus to work

I listen and watch Owl City's Vanillia Twilight MTV as I trot to work. The music is vastly different from my current mood. And in my woolgathering, my phone winked at me making me smile. The shuttle bus came in no time, verily small handful of people and cheered me up. Lastly, I remembered it is a holdiay tomorrow- Gd Friday. And my mood got even better. Happy holiday ya all!

- Posted on my trusty ifone :)