The thing about love is...

It’s Valentine's day, and you can be a sceptic and cynical about this airy thing call Love, or try to understand what Love encompasses. I will leave my thought process at the very last part of this entry and first dish out some luvve to the people around me.

Over Skype on Tuesday night, I had read thr the card Ann gave me and was telling my bf, the happenings of the day when I began crying - it wasnt like those sudden burst into tears... more like gathering of mist in eyes which followed with silent tearing and then into shoulder shaking and choking cries. I might deserve my enemies but I dont think I deserve my friends- how can they be so good to me? so I concluded that someone out there is watching out and over for me. thank you!

Ann: I can ask no more from a sister, what I have already found in you.

Joanne & Gary: despite the short time we know eachother, you guys are great people, sincere and true friends that I eagerly count as my own.

Elaine: as a fellow Actmen, you already have an irreplaceable place in my heart (and yours is a high one too).

Ash: you are so... so what I want to be... I am honored to have a girlfriend like you!

Weilis: my brothers, of course I trust you guys... thanks for making me lol and showing ur concerns. I appreciate it

that Tues, I met some friends of mine for meals... comer y cenar.
For lunch, I met Ann, Joanne and Gary.... we went to Vincent's (or is it Vince's) Kitchen. The food was not bad at all! and the company, even better! These friends of mine- I call them my angels... they are so concern for me and supportive and give great drinking tips! hahaha...
For dinner, I met my IO group minus Ivan and Ho Seng at the Pizza place. we ordered too much and still had spaces for Bens& Jerry.... just show how much we want to cont. spending time in eachother's company...
I REALLY LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!!

ok... so now, the thing about love is that it is such a huge concept, within which many other large concepts are embedded. Some examples of other concepts embedded in Love would be the principles of Grace, Trust and Selflessness. the idea of Grace is forgiveness and unmerited favor- even the undeserved IS deserving. the idea of trust is relinquishing control and taking responsibilities. and Selflessness would be putting others first and making compromises. These ideas are all linked and play out in love in various ways and in various situations. So, love between lovers, among family, among friends, even for fellow human (yes... there is love there too) most likely consist of these ideas taking different priorities and weights. So, that is my idea of Love.

what I found out, when I think about people I love... is that when I love them... I dun expect the same of them immediately or even in the near future... I am willing to wait for them. just to acknowledge my love will make me happy- by calling me their friend is one way. also, every time I think of how the people I love (friends make a bulk of them) love me, in their own ways... life becomes beautiful.

I think also, that love gives strength for people. because people become more selfless, thus their goals takes up some kind of godliness... and they will strive to complete them. that I think is where my mom is coming from. rem the entry "mommy's fears - a stroll in the park" my mom is more worried that I commit suicide then being rape? I had thought the opposite- I rather die than be raped. but now I understand. if I kill myself, im being selfish because I kill a person that someone love. Thus, if I really love the people around me, then I should live. it will be difficult but their love will give me strength to face the next day and every day after.

life is not the greatest gift, love is. life simply celebrates it. And God agrees (1 Corinthians 13:13).

LNY or CNY 08?

this year, with no school, LNY does not represent to me, what it does to many - much needed break from school. but this year, i find myself cherishing this holiday more. most probably because of the coming work relocation. i notice that i am more participative and more open and willing to interact with relatives- distant and not so distant ones.

Also, it is the first year, Yihui came over to bai nian. i am really glad he came. we played majong with my cousins. i truely felt that we have gone deeper into our relationships. he was really glad that i invited him over. and my parents seem alright with our relationship. here are people close to me that i will miss when i head over to guangzhou. they care about me because i am family, and for no reason other than that.

the date is set

on the 10th of March this year. that will be when i will be leaving Sg to go to Guangzhou.

Some things... on the top of have to get list...
1. Hp...
2. Still Hp.... (i will need 2)
3. clothes... esp. office kind...

ok... wat else people? im inexperienced in this man... anyway... there is a high possibility that i will change my hp no.... or at the very least suspend my current no. when i go over.... so please wait for more updates k?

Hoy, como en el restaurante- Manhattan Fish Market con mis compañeros de trabajo.
Despues, veo una pelicula con Yihui - Sweeney Todd. la pelicula esta bien. Cuesta siete dolar para una persona, es precio más barato posible.

Patron's Day 08

my last Patron's day....

mommy's fears - a stroll in the park

sometimes, i tag along with my parents as they go for a stroll in the nearby park (Yes, i know im being a loud lamppost). every time i do it, my dad will end up either walking ahead of my mom and i or lag behind us terribly.

we will talk when we walk (my mom and i)... it is not a often occurrence though (the talking)... just something that happens when one walks aimlessly... this time, mom told me of her deepest worries of my going to china.... she worries that when i met with misfortunate (esp. the ones that are gravest) i will not be able to handle them. Specifically, she worries that if im rape (Touch wood!) i would not be able to walk out of the bad experience... she fears that without family and friends to support and council me, i might commit sucide. when i heard this, i was shock and suddenly very terrified. really, it must be one of the worst case scenarios there is. the others being murder, gang rape and assault(all kinds)...

im being brutally honest here my friends... i cannot guarantee that such evil things will not happen to me.. or to anyone of us. but i hope that if such evilness does really occur to me, or anyone of us... we have each other to fall back on, despite the long distance apart or the long absences of contact.

i wish i can say now "i am strong, i will not be defeated" but all i can say is "god please help me be strong". the bible says ask and you shall receive. and why not? it does not hurt to ask right? because one does not lose out by asking for help.